Anjum Anwar, Blackburn Cathedral's Dialogue Development Officer, writes about the importance of asking difficult questions.

A few days ago I purchased Benazir Bhutto's book on Reconciliation: Islam, Democracy and the West - testament of a woman who lived in the West, understood the East and married into feudalism.

What I picked up from her book was the point about "reconciliation" which should cement "clash of civilisations."

She stressed "engagement" between Islam and the West, not only through dialogue but through building bridges together and through trade - but this cannot be done without engaging with each other.

Benazir was stressing the need for people to talk to each other by asking difficult questions.

It is exactly this "engagement" which is a miss in our societies, which causes myths in our communities, eventually leading to schism between groups of people.

Asking difficult questions are put aside so that we do not offend each other, political corrections takes precedence over seeking the truth.

How does one ask difficult question without the perceived fear of offending people is a difficult questions in it self?

So when my son asked me "why do Christians just give up what they like in Lent, this is not what Jesus (peace be upon him) did, he fasted for 40 days."

I had to tell him that things change over time, I guess - but by saying that, I had also anticipated my son's response. "So why do we fast for a month from sun-rise to sun-set?"

The conversation between my son and I was now eating into his home-work time, so to bring the conversation to some conclusion, I had to tell him "we are all different." However, difficult questions need to be responded to, and I have my own set of difficult questions.

Are we as Muslims living up to our own high standards that our Imams talk about at every Friday sermon, are Christians living up to what Jesus (peace be upon him) had demanded of his flock, or have we, people of faith, manipulated our faiths to suit our own desires?

Has Lent, like Christmas become a commercial commodity, just as Eid and Ramadan are preceded by plans of how many samosas we are going to make?

Asking difficult questions does not mean that we are compromising our own individual values, but by asking questions, we are arriving at a truth that we can all be comfortable with.

The trick is how we ask these questions, do we ask questions by implying that we are trying to prove the other wrong, or do we ask it in a way that seeks to clarify our positions.

I guess Lent is an opportunity for reflections and may be it is also a time for me ask, and for my Christian friends to explain, why Christians only give up what they like best during Lent - is there more to Lent than meets the eye?