WOMEN and men are different in lots of ways, but one of the most obvious is how they conduct friendships.

For women, friendship is an elaborate social networking exercise full of rules and rituals.

For men, friendship can be basically translated as "someone to go to the pub with."

Women regard the telephone a major tool in building and keeping friendships.

We can spend hours talking about everything from serious career options to Aleesha Dixon's outfit in Strictly Come Dancing.

We can happily chat about nothing in particular while watching EastEnders together over the phone, and while away a whole evening talking about that new girl in work who wears too much foundation.

Phone conversations for men are about grunting a few facts, often to do with times and places to meet to drink beer.

Anything more than this, any chatter or showing of emotions, is considered "gay".

And men have no qualms in saying "I'm busy, I'll phone you back," and putting the phone down on each other.

If a girlfriend were to do that you'd assume something awful had happened, like she'd found out you were slagging off her new hairstyle behind her back.

Men usually have a big group of friends, all basically the same, and perhaps a couple of mates they went to school with and are a bit closer to.

These are the ones they'll hug and tell they love when they've had too many beers.

But most girls have almost as many different types of friends as they do shoes.

There's the ballet pumps - the group of friends you can take anywhere and know you'll have a brilliant night.

They're the ones who'll think nothing of lending you their best jumper, and who your parents call "lovely girls" (although it's unlikely they'd say that if they heard some of the stuff you cackled away at on Friday nights down your local pub).

Then there's the stiletto - the mate who you go out clubbing with and always seem to get into the most hilarious of situations with.

She encourages you to wear your shortest skirt, have that last drink for the road, and do things you wouldn't be brave enough to do on your own.

Your boyfriend tells you she's a bad influence - but you know he secretly loves her to bits.

And lastly there's the trusty old pair of slippers, usually known as the "best friend".

She's the one who knows all your deep dark embarrassing secrets and fashion faux pas: she was there to witness them. And even if you don't see her for a couple of months, you immediately slip back into the friendship like you'd never been apart.

Although you love all your shoes, she's the one you love the most.