Celebrity has got its down side. There are frankly too many of them. Now we are really getting desperate because we are making celebrities out of people who look like other supposed' celebrities.

I speak of none other than Chantelle Houghton, who won Celebrity Big Brother. She apparently looks like Paris Hilton, who herself wasn't much of a celebrity to start with.

I flick through gossip magazines to find out if I'm doing anything wrong in the kitchen, but this week I was horrified to see her picture everywhere.

She's the talk of the country now, and there are even people who want her autograph.

Why the hell would they want her autograph? Would you queue to get her autograph? There are people who would and there are plenty of them.

I know the whole ploy of her fooling the other contestants into thinking she was a famous singer was supposed to make us feel happy inside, but it didn't.

Unless the individual has done something of some note I don't think they should be classed as a celebrity.

What's next, a Shuiab Khan lookalike without a receding hairline? Now he would deserve the accolades.

'Do you want your curry on top of your chips?' Such a wonderful question that. It shows that the other person cares enough and understands that there are people who don't want the curry on top of their chips.

They want the curry on the side of the plate or in a separate tub altogether.

With this caring attitude I find it ridiculous that there are fewer and fewer places where I can be served by a human being.

Machines have taken over my life. I phone the gas company and I am greeted by a machine.

This machine knows I am an irate customer with serious emotional issues. But it doesn't care.

I don't have to go to the bank any more. I can do everything over the internet.

There are superstores somewhere that don't need cashiers. You do it yourself. Pack it yourself and swipe your own card through the machine.

People like to get angry at other people. It makes us feel superior but with a machine we don't get the chance.