Dear Massi,I have been married six years and my husband and I did not go through an arranged marriage.
We have two children and my husband adores them.
However, nine months ago he started acting strangely towards me. He became very secretive. It happened overnight.
He would not come home till late in the evening and then when I planned to go out with him he always made excuses.
At first I suspected he was seeing someone else but the truth was even more shocking.
A friend of mine noticed his car parked in another town so I decided to investigate myself. And then I decided to do this regularly. When he said he was going out to his friends he would always come to this house.
My friend decided we had to know who was at this house so we just knocked on the door and this woman opened the door. We explained who we were and she seemed as shocked as I was. It turns out he was married to her too!
My life just fell apart.
Both of us promised to confront him together. But when we did he decided to leave her and stay with me. It has been three months now and everything seems to have gone back to normal.
My friends have told me to get rid of him. But he is a good father. Three months have passed and everything seems to have gone back to normal. I don't know why I am not angrier or have kicked him out?
KL
Preston
MASSI SAYS,
You have been through a very torrid nine months and whilst you have suffered this man has got away with everything.
You were right to confront him. However, once he chose you this does not mean he should be forgiven. He not only led you on but also this other woman and being married to two women is a crime.
I feel you have just let him walk over you without a promise from him that he won't do it again. Maybe you think that if you tell him to go he will go back to this other woman.
Some people get angry and get even whilst others hide their anger and sadness. It is obvious this issue is still bothering you and until you really let him know how you feel he will always manage to walk all over you.
Can you honestly say this won't happen again? If the answer is 'no' then you have some talking to do.
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