IT'S happened! Bury Metropolitan Borough Council in its wisdom has officially raised its car parking charges and started its perilous slide down the slippery slope to hell.

Not that I'm surprised. Labour's theories sound good but always ... well, almost always ... fail to work in practice. And believe me, car parking charges will not be the exception.

I've seen it happen before, in other Labour-controlled towns. Parking charges were increased, motorists found alternative places and the outcome was a 'shortfall' in the account.

Town hall accountants love the word 'shortfall'. It sounds much better than having to tell councillors, "Well I'm sorry lads and lasses, but there's 'ardly owt in t'kitty. I told you what'd 'appen, but everything's done, dusted and decided at caucus meetings before it ever gets into t'chamber, so if you want to blame anybody, blame yourselves!"

I'd love to be able to say that, wouldn't you?

Anyway, what with having to pay attendants to ensure that motorists pay their dues, and having to shell out for a new car park and the increased maintenance at the old ones, we'll more than likely hear next year that there's been "a shortfall."

Councillors will bleat about capping and, as usual, blame the Government.

But what will they do next year? They'll bleat about their losses and Government capping, those councillors with iffy seats will argue about the wisdom of raising prices, but afterr that they'll be daft enough to put the prices up again!

But at least there's some good news. Not, alas, for our town centre retailers, but certainly for Asda at Radcliffe and Pilsworth, Tesco at Prestwich, and Aldi and Kwik Save at Whitefield, and every other local supermarket where parking is still free.

It makes you think, doesn't it? Big business knows how to turn money around. If there was any percentage at all in charging motorists for parking, they'd be doing it - now.

But they're not!

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.