Paul Wells hostage for one year: Mother's agony

While many of her age fret about their children's career prospects or the state of their clothes, Dianne is often unsure whether 25-year-old Paul is still alive.

The initial blow of his kidnap by Kashmiri separatist guerillas a year ago was cushioned by a brief stay in hospital which prevented her family from revealing the news to her. But now she and husband Bob fight what has become a grim daily reality.

"Even when I was told what had happened, I still felt very detached from it all, " said Dianne at the family dormer bungalow in Feniscowles, Blackburn.

"I was still very woozy and, until I came home, very distant. Then I got home to the phone constantly ringing and the newspapers.

"I kept out of the way. It was quite bad at the beginning. Not all of it was the press. Sometimes it was concerned people."

Now calls are vetted by an answering machine which provides a defence against the barrage of interest that is aroused every time the hostages are in the news.

Even that is something Dianne did not expect to be a problem for more than few days.

"At the beginning you think it is going to be another couple of weeks. Then people mention Christmas, birthdays, Easter and you wonder how you will cope.

"That has stopped now. We no longer think in those terms."

The secret of the housewife's cool, even cheerful, demeanour is partly due to a pact between Dianne, Bob, their younger son Stuart and daughter Sarah.

"We try to lead as normal a life as possible and try and just have a break when we feel like it," she added. "If it is for the day we'll go out walking.

"I think it gives us time to think about it, to put things into perspective. It's nice to be out where it's peaceful and to some extent, I think to myself 'Paul is in the mountains'.

"But he's in such a different world to us. I can't even imagine what he's feeling.

"It's not necessarily something we talk about when we are out walking."

Birthdays and Christmas are bad, but Dianne says it is the other times that she feels the full force of her family's predicament.

"It hits you at unexpected times really," she says. "You prepare yourself for the times when you know it's going to be utmost in your mind. You build yourself up to cope with those certain days, but it takes you by surprise several days later."

The ordeal has brought the family closer, especially those who live overseas.

But it has also unearthed previously unnoticed characteristics in Dianne's children.

She is quick to defend a suggestion that Paul is headstrong and adds: "He's his own person with his own different thoughts. He loves the outdoors.

"When he was younger he was quite adventurous, not naughty, but adventurous. He liked climbing things, fences, trees." she laughs.

"Stuart is deeper, a lot deeper. Sometimes it's a job to to know what Stuart is thinking.

"He and Paul were closer, especially as they lived together in Nottingham.

"Paul was also close to Sarah in some respects. She likes the outdoors.

"But in things like music he was closer with Stuart. When they were younger they used to be into heavy rock.

"I think in some ways Paul acted as a bridge between the two of them which they both miss now."

The lack of an SAS-style rescue operation has left many people fearing that nothing is happening behind the scenes. But the family are confident that the operation to free their son is up to strength.

"Yes, we've been down and met all the people at the Foreign Office who are involved, we are quite sure that everybody involved is doing everything possible to help," says Dianne.

Back home they have also done their bit.

She adds: "Bob has kept a diary. I think particularly to help himself sort things out and particularly for Paul, so that he will know himself what has been done in his absence.

"As far as we are currently concerned, the whole thing is a big unknown. We've learned to ignore most of the horror stories that have appeared in the papers and only believe what the Foreign Office tell us. It's worrying at first but then you find you can ignore it.

"Some of the stories have upset us, particularly Stuart and Sarah. Especially the ones that suggested they were 'The Forgotten Hostages'.

"It was just the way it was written. People here in Blackburn haven't forgotten about Paul. The national papers may have forgotten about him, but people in Blackburn and Nottingham haven't.

"But we realise, perhaps because of the Indonesian hostages, that unless you live locally, it can be easy to think that.

"We know all the hundreds of people that are dealing with the situation in loads of different countries all over the world.

As a whole the East Lancashire community has rallied round to help.

Dianne adds: "We have received cards and flowers, some from friends and some from strangers.

"I would like to thank everybody for their support."

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