ONE cannot help sharing the exasperation of solicitor Simon Jones on hearing that police objected to longer opening hours for the F J Nichols pub in Blackburn town centre.

They were not worried about the usual hazards associated with late night drinking - violence, drunkeness, urinating in the street etc.

No, one of their main worries was that noise from the pub revellers would disturb prisoners kept in the station cells across the road. "I have experience of being in the police cells at that time of night and seeing what officers have to put up with," Mr Jones told magistrates.

"It is far from a tranquil atmosphere. In fact, the noise from the cells is often like something from Fred Karno's circus."

However, the police objection makes us wonder whether Mr Jones visited the cells in Blackburn or in some other town.

Surely, he will have missed seeing the inmates as they sucked their thumbs in rocking chairs and listened to Val Doonican, while the warders in their carpet slippers wished them sweet dreams and gently closed the door, making sure it did not bang, of course!

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.