A QUIVERING club steward today told how he was almost forced to do a solo "Full Monty" to satisfy scores of wild women when a male stripper didn't turn up.

In the end, terrified Bob Foster's wife Doreen saved the day by calming the angry crowd who had paid to see Simon "The Whipping Boy" Richards take his clothes off.

Female fans of hit film The Full Monty had crammed into the Orchard Working Mens Club in Whalley New Road, Bastwell, Blackburn, for the raunchy live show.

But when Simon did not arrive on Wednesday evening club steward Bob, 56, said: "I really thought we had a riot on our hands. There were 130 women all going daft and I didn't have a clue what to do.

"I asked three of the guys in the games room whether they would do a Full Monty with me, but they said no. A lot of the women had paid for taxis and babysitters and taken the night off. "I was thinking of getting up on stage to strip myself until my wife Doreen stepped in. I couldn't have faced them to say the night was off!"

The act had been booked by concert secretary Norman Yates who was also too frightened to confront the £2.50-a-head crowd.

Bob said the problem had arisen because of "a misunderstanding" about the date when Simon would appear.

But Simon said he had been booked to perform on Thursday, February 19, and not Wednesday, February 18.

In the crowd was Pam Earrey from the Bite-t-Ate sandwich shop in Sudell Cross, Blackburn.

She said: "It was a bit of a shock. The singer came on at 8.30pm and was still on stage at 9pm when we expected the stripper to start.

"The singer said 'I'm very sorry to tell you that he hasn't turned up' but everyone thought it was a wind-up.

"When we found out it was true people started banging on the tables and singing 'why are we waiting'."

Stewardess Doreen said the crowd was disappointed but conducted themselves with decorum in the circumstances.

She added: "I think they would have only listened to a woman."

The club hopes to make it up to the strip fans with another show planned for next Friday.

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