THE political post-match talks after last week's astonishing election results would have made interesting spectacles I feel. The Greens no doubt would have been spraying the dressing rooms with champagne (organically produced of course) and shared a few cress sandwiches to mark their tremendous achievement.

The Tories have got three new stars but have to settle for mid-table mediocrity having failed to increase their points tally - if only their tactics had targeted the title favourites (Labour) they may well have reached the play-offs.

"So now you're gonna believe us," was the chant heard from the dressing room of the MBIs well into the early hours and I'd expect an open-top bus tour ending up at Morecambe town hall any day now!

The Liberal Democrats were reportedly delighted with their two-point improvement on last time out but I can't see them being title contenders in my lifetime.

And then of course there's the Manchester City of the local political world - the Labour group. So much support, so much potential, (nice pies!), well organised and yet getting trounced by the minnows before stunned bosses in the dugout.

Some tears, obviously, and one or two bad-tempered exchanges as weary players left the field refusing to swap shirts or shake hands. Their coaches may shake their heads in disbelief but the players followed their game plan to the letter despite the crowds letting them know week in and week out in the local fanzine, The Citizen, that new tactics were needed to ensure continued survival in the top-flight.

Amid allegations of spitting, shirt-tugging and diving some claim it was a dirty game but this commentator saw fouls committed by all sides and, as you know, these things tend to cancel each other out over a season!

So what of the upcoming fixtures? Well I think we can expect some much tighter games with new formations cancelling each other out but despite this could still provide much entertainment for the fans.

Personally I couldn't give a stuff who wins the title, being into less bloody sports such as boxing, but I do care that the season ticket holder's hard earned cash is spent on providing good value for money and that the shareholders can see (at all times) how their cash is spent and those who don't play the game properly should be red-carded immediately!

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.