Down by the Riverside with Phil Lloyd APPARENTLY, we all do it. I know because I read it in a book (one with big words in). We do it whenever something seriously shocks us, like the trauma of redundancy. Or the sudden death of a loved one. Or relegation.

We deny it. We reject the fact that it can possibly have happened - at least, not to us. We imagine that things can somehow be the same again.

That just about sums up how I've been spending the ten weeks since penning my last column. For a while, I still dreamed of a miraculous escape, with various highly-plausible scenarios leading to an amazing reprieve. One of the most credible involved those two loveable teams, Man. United and Arsenal, leaving the Premiership to join the newly-formed Microsoft World Domination League. Another imaginary escape route came from the financial scandal that engulfed two other endearing clubs, Newcastle and Middlesbrough, leading to their summary expulsion from the top flight.

Most amazing (and, sadly, least credible) of all was Gary Willard's late decision, having spent half the summer watching reruns of Match of the Day, to award a penalty for Petterson's assault on Ashley Ward at Charlton, forcing the final three games to be replayed.

Suddenly, one Thursday in June, came the inescapable truth, the harsh facts contained in the new fixture list! To quote Craig Short's recent words: "Instead of Man. United in the first game, I'll be playing Port Vale at home" and I have no intention of adding "with all due respect to Vale", because I wouldn't mean it. Throughout the denial phase, I found myself constantly looking for positives, clutching at straws like the remote and ultimately vain possibility that Sutty might stay, or the three away grounds that I'll visit for the first time this season to see Rovers play. Recently, I even got a bit excited by the pre-season goal feast in Norway (hey, Frederikstad, can we play you every week?)

But in the end, it's hard to pull the wool over your own eyes. And, sad to say, it's been hard to work up much enthusiasm for the programme scheduled for us, not helped by more "tales of the expected" from the treatment room and a "rocky horror show" performance against Oldham.

Not a moment too soon, then, came an instalment of "New Faces", introducing some experienced "Gladiators" to the Rovers ranks and a good effort in the 'Holiday Programme' against Liverpool. Already, there's a buzz among the supporters again and Saturday will see us give a ticker-tape, bunting-bedecked welcome to life in Division One. Bring your banners down to the game, "cos there'll be plenty of room for them in the Darwen End! "

Now I could be churlish and recall how I derided Everton for signing the aforementioned Mr Short (and Kevin Campbell, but that's another story).

I could suggest that Brian Kidd's Blue and White Army has in its ranks conscripts who might be effective fighting the forthcoming series of battles, but who will be ill-equipped to take on the more powerful forces that we hope to be engaging in 12 months" time.

But I won't, because it doesn't matter right now. I just hope Ewoods new catering arrangements include large helpings of humble pie because we will need that to get us through this season. We're about to get a sharp taste of reality after the finer fare of the Premiership, and we'll be seen as the mighty fallen, a prize scalp for all teams visiting Ewood.

There will be tougher nuts than Port Vale in the months ahead, but let's hope we can start cracking them from day one. Suddenly, I can't wait for it all to start!

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.