MY comments about looking after my mother (Letters, August 25) have caused many readers to think about the old and their lot.

I have had letters from other carers, who, despite having people to look after, found time to write and wish me well.

That is the crux of the matter. That is the type of people they are - kind and generous. That is exactly what the authorities such as the social services and others use against us. Our kindness is used as a weakness.

I have also had people say I am doing it for the money. To put the record straight, my mother has no money. She sold a farm 15 years ago and gave most of it to her five children. The rest went on residential home fees.

She has no money at all and income support provides the money now. Two of her children died and she has me and another daughter and a son, who, for various reasons, are not involved with her care. Having relatives does not mean they will look after you in old age.

I am writing to many of the 'top knobs' who can change the rules to make it a bit easier for us to keep our loved relatives at home. They are cushioned in their fancy offices and on their large wages and none of them will be brave enough to stand up and make ripples.

They all say they understand but none of them is prepared to help. The 'rules' forbid it.

So much money is wasted on office staff that hardly any gets to us, and we are the reason they have a job in the first place. These people must think they will enjoy their present lifestyle forever. They won't. One of two things will happen to all of us. The first is old age and falling victim to the selfish system that exists now. The second is death. Tragically and cruelly, this is preferable to being at the mercy of the present system. Until you get involved with old age problems, you do not know. The petty rules are great stumbling blocks.

Did you know there are three types of homes for the elderly - residential, nursing and dual registered?

Did you know that the nursing team that changes your dressings and attends to you every day is not allowed to even visit you in a nursing home? The nurses are not allowed to continue your treatment if you go into a home. The home is responsible for your treatment - even if you go in for just two days.

Did you know 80 per cent of home helps employed by social services were made redundant in Burnley? Most of the 'care' is bought from private agencies. Some are good; some less than useless. Costs are £7.50 to £8.50 per hour to assist you. This fee depends on your own financial circumstances.

If you have no money, social services assess how much they will allow for your particular case; anything over that - you pay.

Did you know the nursing team do not have any contact with the care agency that comes in to change your bed and move your position? Did you know that each agency you deal with - continence team, community loan store, doctor, district nurse, social services, social security, soiled waste collection, meals on wheels, chemist, chiropodist, private care agency, laundry (if you can afford to use one), wheelchair supplier - must all be dealt with separately by you. None of them seems to talk to each other.

Take some advice - prepare for your old age and find out what is in store for you. If you don't like it, make a fuss and change it.

MICHELLE PICKERING (Mrs), Olympia Street, Burnley.

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.