O GOSH! Wills has passed THREE A-levels. And one was an A grade too.

Wow! What an achievement -- unless we contrast the heir to the throne's successes with those of some inner city kids from state schools. But of course, we're not...are we?

I SEE gushing breakfast pair Richard Madeley and Judy Finnegan have renewed their marriage vows after 14 years of wedded bliss. Thankfully, the affair was a small one, so we've been spared huge photo spreads in the feebler minded tabloids. The whole sugary scenario still put me off my cornflakes though.

A MUM is considering legal action after her son was "scarred for life" as he played on a Blackburn building site. The four-year-old was hit by scaffolding as he played in a pile of sand with a seven-year-old pal, who was also hurt. Don't people TALK to their children any more? And if they're too young to understand then surely they're too young to be wandering the streets.

ALLOTMENT holders in Blackburn are patrolling their plots after repeated vandal attacks. Ironic, that while they'd prefer to nurture fruit and veg they've got to waste time on pond life.

RIBBLE Valley Council is tackling the root cause of juvenile nuisance and threatening to take parents of persistent offenders to court. About time too. Might shake up some of those slobs who think parental responsibility amounts to merely giving birth then blowing the family allowance on booze and fags.