LIKE Oliver Cromwell I'd ban dancing. It's the silliest pastime ever invented.

I've avoided getting up since I won a prize for doing the twist at a bit of a do in the Scanda - the Co-op restaurant, so it shows how long it is since I willingly tripped the light fantastic.

I've been dragged up a few times after a few scoops but stepping out is not my favourite hobby.

I don't know why I feel that way because I loved throwing the lads about in Scottish dancing at junior school - formation dancing to the music of Jimmy Shand and his band was something we were subjected to something and often.

I know it's really good exercise but these days I'd rather sit every one out, thankyou.