REGARDING the proposed Church Street, Blackburn, sculptures, once again we witness gifted artists presenting the public with works of art that leave us wondering and scratching our heads (LET, February 7).

To add further confusion to the issue, I am thinking of adding my own contribution for consideration.

The following inscription could be on a stone plaque fixed close to the sculptures. The text gives an explanation of them to anyone who may be puzzled -- or, if they are not, they soon will be . . .

"If it isn't. Could they be? If it wasn't.

Will there be? No, they shouldn't. Well, I'm blow'd!

I adore them. I loathe them. I love them.

I hate them. What are they? Can't stand them.

What the hell! Absolutely fabulous!

It kind of. No, it doesn't. Let's forget it."

I have tried to keep it as abstract as possible, but if you think it is too self-explanatory, I could do the same in, say, gobbledegook French, Portugese shorthand, simple Russian (but written in invisible ink), ow'd Lancashire or just plain double Dutch.

There is a message in there somewhere, but, to be honest, I don't understand it myself.

I would appreciate readers' views on this. Who knows? -- if there's 80 per cent or more of us who don't like it, there's every chance it will be accepted by the council's executive board.

TOM ANSBRO, Feniscliffe Drive, Blackburn.