READERS by now should know I'm not a fan of poetry, but I sometimes allow the odd verse to creep in.

The lack of public loos in Leigh prompted this gem from a pensioner who wishes to remain anonymous, for obvious reasons.

If the doctor gives you diuretics

Don't go into Leigh

You're bound to have an accident

I know, it's happened to me.

Whilst walking round in Netto

I got the urge to go

So I dashed off to Bengal Street

The nearest loo I know

But since Big Wiggin took over

We're just a one-horse town

I might have known when I got there

That the shutter would be down

There's one in the public library

But not for public use

Now then I start to panic

My bladder's coming loose

So I make it to the bus station,

Don't smile I'm not joking,

Just as I got through the door

Too late my pants are soaking.

It's tough getting older. I too know the feeling of being desperate to go, there's nothing worse.

But once again, the minority of people who vandalise public loos have ended the convenience for the rest of us. READERS by now should know I'm not a fan of poetry, but I sometimes allow the odd verse to creep in.

The lack of public loos in Leigh prompted this gem from a pensioner who wishes to remain anonymous, for obvious reasons.

If the doctor gives you diuretics

Don't go into Leigh

You're bound to have an accident

I know, it's happened to me.

Whilst walking round in Netto

I got the urge to go

So I dashed off to Bengal Street

The nearest loo I know

But since Big Wiggin took over

We're just a one-horse town

I might have known when I got there

That the shutter would be down

There's one in the public library

But not for public use

Now then I start to panic

My bladder's coming loose

So I make it to the bus station,

Don't smile I'm not joking,

Just as I got through the door

Too late my pants are soaking.

It's tough getting older. I too know the feeling of being desperate to go, there's nothing worse.

But once again, the minority of people who vandalise public loos have ended the convenience for the rest of us.