THE entire readership of this fine publication is indebted to Trevor Hanson for his recent forthright opinions on referees in Cliches...sorry, Tales from the Touchline.

Firstly, for revealing that the average parks red is in fact more skilled than his Premiership counterpart.

That is of course correct.

Just like the 18 stone defender I recently watched at Pleasington who was in fact more accomplished than Rio Ferdinand.

Secondly, we owe Trev for reminding us that the best referees are those we never see. I have just watched the PSV v Leeds game where the Italian official ticked the box requesting anonymity.

The fact that Olivier Dacourt survived with both legs intact owed more to his ability to triple salchow and double lutz than any degree of protection from Snr Branchi.

More studs were evident than at a Grab a Granny night.

The overtly aggressive play of the PSV midfielder was more Rommel than Van Bommel!

No names were entered into the officials book.

In fact, first degree murder would have gone unpunished. Half a dozen injuries and skilful play marginalised. Still it was great not to see the ref!

Thirdly thanks to the old keeper for his assertion that ex-players would make infinitely better officials.

Former pros never view incidents from bad angles. Their view is never blocked by other players. They would never be conned by a clever dive by the Brazilian number 10. When refusing the last mintute home penalty they would never be subjected to "Who's the ***** in the black!"

Actually, there is an ex-pro on the national list. Can you remember when the was last down at Ewood? No?

Nuff said.

Next week I will argue why the standard of goalkeeping will only be improved when referees are fast tracked between the posts.