I READ Asian Image quite a lot and was wondering if you could give me some advice.

I've known my boyfriend for 3 years and we love each other very much. My parents have said I can't marry him because of his cast which is different from mine.

I respect their decision but I can't stop loving him. I've tried staying away and kept no communication with him but that makes things harder.

My parents are very stubborn but I don't want to hurt my boyfriend.

Things are quite serious between us and he wants an answer from me on whether I will marry him.

His parents don't know about us but he believes their reaction will be the same as my parents. Please help, I'm confused and I don't know what to do.

CB Bolton

Massi says

I get many of these letters and it always seems there is a lack of communication between parents and their children. The final decision no matter what still lies with you and your parents deep down know that as does your boyfriend.

In your letter though you say you have asked your parents yet he has not asked his own. It is quite strange that he wants a decision from you yet he has not even asked his own parents. He has then put the onus on you. What could happen is that you could tell him 'yes' and then he could turn around and say his parents won't agree.

If you intend to get married you need both of you to work towards this because it seems at this stage you're doing all the work.

It is always easier for a male to get his own way in our community and he should be taking the bolder steps. I know it is difficult in such a situation because you are stuck in the middle.

Only you know deep down what you have to do and remember it is not about taking sides but making the right decision.