FIRST of all I want to say that the guy PBK from Nelson who wrote in about being crazy over this girl. It is just natural. It happens.

I don't think it's his fault for lurking around corners just to see her because I am just in the same state as him but vice-versa (a girl over a guy!)

I've seen him a few times and I'm a friend of his. I talk to him as a friend, he knows that I like him but doesn't know that I am crazy over him.

I feel as if he likes me too but am not really sure. He's even told me he loves me in some messages. We never meet up personally.

It's been over a year that I've been crazy over him. All my friends say how can I put up with it, I just don't have the answer to that really.

I don't want to tell him properly just in case he rejects me or stops talking to me at all. Its driving me crazy.

I never thought I'd ever fall for someone like this. First of all when I stopped talking to him he kept on ringing me with-holding his number and he would stay silent over the phone.

I know it's him because he always does that when I break up with him. I just don't know what to do. If he really loves me he'd show that he is interested in me and he would tell me but why doesn't he before it's too late?

I love him so much. He gets upset if I talk about any other guys but I don't understand why he is torturing me like this.

I wait near the phone every day just in case he rings. I've stopped going out and not concentrating on any of my work. My mum is getting really suspicious about me. I just can't help it.

I always get worried if he doesn't call within two days but come on, I know I'm only a friend at the moment. I'm 24 hours in the house thinking about him. He doesn't go to the same college as me so that makes it even worse. He works far away somewhere else, so I don't see him at all.

Help me please.

A.I.I, Blackburn

Massi says,

Your situation is a lot different from the gentleman you mention in the beginning of your letter.

He was on the borderline of being an outright stalker. You on the other hand are in love with someone who you trust as a friend.

From what you say in your letter it seems your friend is just waiting for you to make the first move. Or there could be other reasons why he doesn't want to do anything. You say you never meet him at all and all this is going on through messages and phone calls. Then you need to ask yourself 'is this guy really who he says he is?' Maybe that's the reason he just wants to flirt and do nothing else.

If you want relationship with this person you need to clear the air with him and make him understand how you feel. At the moment both of you are flirting with each other and skirting around the relationship issue and all he is doing is leading you on.

If he gets annoyed about you talking to other guys then he may have feelings towards you but doesn't know how to express them. You obviously have strong feelings towards him and you could spend a long time thinking about how he feels towards you. Or you can take control and aim to find out how he really feels.

The best ways to do this in your case would be to first, arrange to meet him, second, say that you seeing someone else, third, tell him you feel he is leading you on. Then wait for his reaction. You'll know automatically how he REALLY feels towards you.