IT is 25 years since the King of Rock 'n' roll died yet by next week he could be the country's number one artist.
A version of his classic A Little Less Conversation is set to be released on Monday with pre-sale orders so high that pundits predict it will sweep to the top, earning him a history-making 18th UK number one.
Currently Elvis and the Beatles share the record with 17 UK number ones apiece. That achievement is testament to the impact they had on popular culture all over the world and history is right to recognise Elvis and the Beatles are on equal par.
But now Elvis is going to change that. He is going to edge ahead and history will be rewritten.
It's not that which actually irks me. The fact that Elvis should be getting a number one a quarter of a century after his last (Way Down, 1977) and 45 years after his first (All Shook Up, 1957) really gets to me.
I love Elvis. But he should not be releasing any more singles. Singles are aimed at the younger market and the image of some teeny-bopper going into HMV, pawing over the latest releases before fighting with the choice of buying Elvis or Will Young - or worse both together - is appalling.
Some may argue that the single, officially titled Elvis v JXL, is appealing to a new generation of fans. JXL, a DJ, has even been so good as to add 2002 drumbeats and all sorts of noises to bring the King up to date. Daring to interfere with an Elvis song is tantamount to blasphemy. I wonder if the great British public would be so appreciative if I changed the words of the Bible to make it more accessible to the young and called it Jamie v Jesus 2002 Church Mix.
Elvis does not need to appeal to a younger market. He is Elvis. Anybody who has even a remote interest in music should know who Elvis is and search out his originals for themselves and not resort to buying cheap gimmicks.
I have spent this past week looking for a record containing the original song - which was actually recorded for his 1968 film Live A Little Love a Little. I have been rifling through the plastic boxes in charity shops, searching for the Holy Grail, although as yet to no avail.
That is what the Elvis experience is about. It should be like a quest with the added bonus that every other song on the record is bound to be a classic also - especially if it was recorded in his fat phase.
I felt the same about the Beatles when they released Free As A Bird in 1995. They should have left it on the anthology collection. The worst thing about that was it was kept off the top spot by Michael Jackson. Such an indignity should serve as a warning to any band.
They have their day and then they should pack up. Beatles and Elvis records should be consigned to museums where only those truly interested can get them.
As for the Rolling Stones, they really should have called it a day years ago.
The music scene of today is purely for the gain of the record companies and it's sad to see Elvis embroiled in the battle for number one.
If he was alive today, you would like to think that making records would be the last thing on his cheeseburger-fried mind. He would probably be working in the chip shop swearing he was not Elvis.
The King is dead, long live the King.
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