with the Rev Kevin Logan, of Christ Church, Accrington

ADULTS ONLY! Saturday Message goes x-rated. To be read only after the nine o' clock watershed.

Readers of a nervous disposition and those who can't cope with GOD and SEX in the same sentence should pick another column.

Tonight, we focus on God in the bedroom. Divinity among the marital beds! Too hot to handle? Am I going too far?

But why? Wasn't the first bedroom scene God's idea?

According to Genesis at the start of the Bible, he created Adam and Eve, and when they joined him in the creating game, God shouted out, probably with a wide grin: "This is very good!" Let 's face it, if sex were a saucepan it would have 'Made by God' stamped on its bottom.

Some of us holy folk wished it wasn't so divine, a bit like some of our stricter brethren who wished Jesus had turned wine into water rather than the other way round.

But this is no kill-joy God. He could have placed a boring old button behind Eve's left ear instructing Adam to press in case of maternity.

But, instead and well, we post-watershed readers know what came instead - a beautiful, humorous, delightfully messy, sloppy and totally exhilarating method of multiplication.

At creation, it was God's first commandment. God and sex went together as naturally as men and women.

But not today. The two are poles apart. And maybe, just maybe, this is where we're getting it all wrong.

Divorcing God from sex is breaking hearts, homes, relationships and ending in horrifying abuse.

Our top tip: Invite God back into your sex life. How?

Can you come back next week?