THE issue of forced marriages has been in the media spotlight for some time, but what if you went along with it to appease your family and then you met someone who captured your heart? What if you were single and the man you wanted to marry was already married? And what if you didn't mind and agreed to be a second wife? We talk to one couple - a husband and his second wife-to-be - who explain what led them to take this extraordinary step. Names have been changed to protect identities.

His story

HAROON is in love. But not with his wife.

Under British law he is forbidden to take another wife but in Islamic law, the Shariah, he can.

And now he and his girlfriend are planning a secret nikah wedding ceremony.

The 33-year-old is in a very difficult position. His first marriage was unusual, to say the least.

"The circumstances around my first marriage were not normal. It was a forced marriage because I had no choice. It was my brother who was due to get married but he changed his mind at the 11th hour. My father took me to one side and told me I had to save the family honour."

So he married the woman chosen for his brother and, inevitably, they did not get on. She was from Pakistan and their personalities clashed.

The normal route would be a separation and divorce but he feared a backlash from his family and she said she would not be allowed back in the family home in Pakistan and would be stigmatised.

"Besides, the children came along. And although I felt nothing for my wife, I did feel responsible for the children. Thinking of her bringing them up alone was too much to bear and every time I tried to walk out on her I came back because of the children."

But there was a further complication - Zenab, who had already caught Haroon's eye.

"I had seen Zenab a few times before I got married. She worked in a shop and I thought she was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.

"She smiled shyly at me and I thought she liked me too. We were very formal with each other but it got to the stage where I even took my dad round to see her."

But then Zenab moved away and Haroon thought that was the end of that. "In the end I decided I would not see her again, it was not meant to be and so I went ahead and got married."

But as soon as he did he realised he had made a terrible mistake.

"I had not even seen my wife's photograph, let alone talked to her. I took a massive gamble but I felt I had no choice. The whole family had ganged up on me."

But Haroon went into the marriage hopeful things would work out between him and his bride, despite the unusual circumstances. Sadly, he was wrong.

"Looks-wise my wife was what people would say was beautiful but being from Pakistan we had nothing in common. We didn't even speak the same language and it was horrible. She also had a very petulant, childish nature."

Then he bumped into Zenab at the university. "It was so weird seeing her again after all that time.

"We began talking for the first time and really hit it off. But I was married."

But the pair met each other again and Zenab revealed she had always been interested in Haroon but felt he had not shown any feelings towards her.

"It was much, much later that we told each other how we felt and then it was too late." He was already married.

Haroon even went as far as trying to set up Zenab with his brother but that did not work. "In the end I had to admit that my feelings were too strong."

Her story

"I USED to see Haroon at the shop and he seemed nice," said Zenab.

"I had a feeling that he liked me but he was really shy. I wanted to speak to him but apart from, 'Hello, how are you?' we never did.

"Then after ages and ages we bumped into each other in the gym at the university. He told me he was married and I was gutted. It was only then that I realised that I had strong feelings for him."

But there was nothing that could be done.

In the meantime Zenab, 25, who was studying for a degree in psychology, was being inundated with marriage proposals herself.

She had also ended an engagement with her cousin because she thought the pair were too different.

"A lot of people were coming to my house and I was rejecting everybody. At the back of my mind I was thinking of Haroon."

After bumping into each other again Zenab started to think that fate was lending a hand though they initially tried to deny it.

"It was so funny because Haroon even tried to set me up with his brother but it was a complete disaster. In the end he admitted to me that he was happy me and his brother didn't get on because he liked me."

At the beginning they were very secretive about their relationship but when their feelings grew they met each other's families though the respective parents are still in the dark about the relationship.

Zenab said most people are shocked when they discover she wants to be a second wife.

"My friends think I am mad for marrying a man who is already married and that I will get nothing but grief but I think you only have one chance in life and he is mine.

"I know people will think I am nave but they don't know what the real situation is.

"He has been through a lot with his marriage and they are not compatible, but we are and I want to be there for him as a wife should.

"His wife knows about us and her reaction depends on what mood she is in.

"I'm not saying things are perfect. Things are difficult sometimes. Haroon gets jealous when people come to the house with marriage proposals but I have never told him to leave his wife.

She is the mother of his children and she has a right to him too."

A COUNSELLOR'S VIEW

ALYAS KARMANI, a Muslim counsellor who has worked with couples, said the situation was not common but it was not unique either.

"Islam permits four wives but the key thing is fairness, justice, honesty and openness.

"The family is of primary importance in Islam and anything which harms the family is not allowed. In today's society you have the situation where there are fewer and fewer eligible men and more women so what is a woman to do?

"She has feelings and needs and if a man can support more than one wife then in Islam he can marry more.

"In today's society there are many men who are promiscuous, who have mistresses who even have children by the married men but they have no protection from the law.

"Islam safeguards the married women, protecting the children that come from that relationship. It also elevates the position of the second woman, she's not a bit on the side or the evil party.

"But my best advice would be for Zenab to speak to a lot of people who are in a similar situation so she goes in with her eyes open."