MY pre-Christmas appeal for a square sausage that didn't keep rolling back to the cooked bit brought the following advice:

"Try Richmond Pork, they're not square though, they'd look funny

if they were. How about oblong?-- Porky."

Thanks for the cutting response, it set me up for the day.

WHY do men left to their own devices for a few hours think there's only bacon in the world to eat?