THE following notice should be pinned to every church door in the land: RELIGION CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH.

You might guess that I'm not one of life's natural spin-doctors. Surely, this is the opposite of what my job is all about.

And why proclaim this when two-thirds of our flock have gone missing? With fear and trembling, might I whisper that maybe, just possibly, it's religion that's caused the pew few?

By religion, I mean that which happens when humans get hold of God's things to cause wars between nations, power games between brothers and boredom between the ears.

By religion, I mean that which turned blacks into sub-humans in South Africa, enslaved them in the USA, and branded women second-class citizens throughout history.

When God turned up in the flesh, the religious lot killed him.

God offered a relationship not a religion.

From Eden onwards, it's always been about you and me and God - love God first and love your neighbour as yourself.

God forgive us for fashioning an Ulster or a Middle East out of such tender simplicity; for turning this beautiful relationship into law-bound, boring, humanity-wrenching religion.

If we ever get a religious Ofsted - and it's long overdue - the inspector's first test should be: does this church inspire an exciting, dynamic, loving relationships with our incredible Creator?