nIT'S July 1990 and England are preparing for their most important football game since 1966 - the World Cup semi finals versus West Germany.

In Majorca Bill and Monica are on holiday trying to rekindle their troubled marriage. Monica has been seeing Dan who arrives unexpectedly at the hotel.

In the company of Ian and Brigitta the five of them settle down to watch the game on telly.

These are the events of Blackburn Drama Club's third play of the season - An Evening With Gary Lineker.

This side splitting comedy follows, in real time, the 90 minutes, extra time and penalty shoot out as everyone rushes headlong towards the inevitable. Warning: this play contains strong language.

The comedy runs from Wednesday March 10 until Saturday March 13 at 7.30 pm at The Thwaites Empire Theatre. For tickets (costing £5 - £6) call (01254) 680137.

nA PLAIN, bespectacled girl makes for an unlikely heroine in Blackburn Arts Club's production of Wedding of the Year, to be staged at the Club Theatre, Gibraltar Street until March 6.

Produced by Andrew Bell, it is a tale about a young girl called Alison Murchinson whose Uncle Frank decides to make her dreams come true by entering her into a local newspaper competition for a Wedding of the Year.

Frank selects a designer to create her wedding dress, arranges the church, reception and honeymoon all before one important piece of the jigsaw is found - there isn't a husband!

Tickets are £5 with concessions available at £3.50 on Tuesday and Wednesday only.

nPENDLE Opera's production of the Tales of Hoffmann will be performed at Burnley Mechanics from March 10 to 13 at 7.15pm.

The opera covers three separate plots in which Hoffmann is the victim of thwarted passion. In Act I he is obsessed with Olympia, a mechanical doll, in Act II with the courtesan Giulietta and in Act III with the consumptive Antonia.

Hoffmann himself is played by a professional tenor, Peter Clements, who has worked with Opera North. Reviews have commented on his "full-blooded singing and sensitive acting".

Tickets are available (£6 on Wednesday, £6 - £9 Thursday - Saturday) by calling (01282) 664400 or (01282) 424039.

nREVIDGE Fold Church ADS presents The Edge Of Darkness by Brian Clemens in the church hall from March 25 - 27. For tickets, call (01254) 54986.

nA MOP-haired orphan and her dog Sandy are paying a visit to Colne to star in one of the 20th century's most popular musicals.

The Colne Operatic Society presents Annie with an all-star cast.

Producer Stephen Burrows and musical director Lisa Manley will help to make the event a memorable occasion.

The show is being performed at the Pendle Hippodrome Theatre, starting on Monday, March 15 and running for a week. Tickets are priced at £8, and £6 for concessions, from (01282) 869513.

nBLACKBURN Amateurs will stage South Pacific at Oswaldtwistle Civic Theatre between May 10 and 15.

nST Mary's Players, of Bacup, have now cast their spring production When the Cat's Away. Janet Hall will play Mildred Roper, Tom Daniels will appear as George Roper, Rita Chew as Ethel Pomfrey and Paul Dearden as Humphrey Pomfrey. The play will be staged at the Leisure Hall, Bacup, from Wednesday, March 24 to Friday, March 26 at 7.30pm.