JAMIE Speare admits he never envisaged missing out on Accrington Stanley's full-time adventure next season.
But the popular goalkeeper, who has been put on the transfer list after six years at the club, said he could not afford to give up work with the contract that was offered by Reds manager John Coleman.
Speare, a bank worker in Merseyside, said: "He (Coleman) has managed to persuade people with good jobs to give up work and play full-time football, so he probably hasn't offered them what he's offered me.
"I can't afford to take what they wanted me to and, to be honest, I felt it was a token offer.
"I'd been looking forward to going full-time but there was nothing to consider for me. I'd have been cutting my own throat if I'd have accepted it."
The 27-year-old, who marries girlfriend Kerry at the end of this month, was the only player to survive Coleman's cull when the Reds boss first took over in 1999.
But Speare, who signed from Sligo Rovers in 1998, says he must now look to a future without Accrington Stanley.
"I'm not asking for special treatment because I've been there the longest," he said.
"John's got his reasons for offering what he has offered, just the same as I've got my reasons for not accepting it.
"The last thing I want is to fall out about it. I don't want to lose his friendship over this because I've no hard feelings at all."
The signing of goalkeeper Jon Kennedy last season meant that, for the first time in his spell with Stanley, former Everton trainee Speare had real competition for the number jersey.
The keeper's shirt changed hands on several occasions in a running battle between the two stoppers.
And Speare has backed Kennedy to do well if he accepts his new contract.
"Jon's a good lad and a really good goalkeeper in his own right. If he stays and is playing regularly then I wish him all the best, as a I do every single player who's there now," said Speare.
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