THANK God and anyone else up there that it's finally over.

One more day of tedious election coverage would have had me reaching for a fag (which I can't anymore since the anti-smokers brigade are after us all).

I don't care what anyone says, but the whole thing was as interesting as a council meeting where everyone turns up and has a chance to speak for at least five minutes on the state of their back alley and all that resides within it.

That said, however, I must say it came to an end rather quickly.

An election when you know the result the very next day is not the kind of election I'm interested in.

After all the hype about about how close it was going to be I was kind of disappointed when they announced the winner within 24 hours.

The couple of weeks of deliberating and lawyers was supposed to be the best bit, wasn't it?

MAYBE some of the winners, or in this case one, will resign and become an Independent later this month.

And then, having become an Independent, instead of remaining so he will reject his mates and want to re-join the ruling party once more.

Having managed to stay up until 2am I went to bed safe in the knowledge that I would awake with the world a much safer place.

But alas it was not meant to be and for those wanting a Bush-free Christmas I'm sorry to say it's going to be a rough four years.

The whole episode did remind me though why I love Americans.

I love them because they gave me Cagney and Lacey and the songs of Bobby Darin.

And I can't function on a Friday night without a McDonalds and a can of Halal Coke.

But most of all I love Americans because they have a lot of fun about things, even those as boring as a general election.

Despite all the criticism they get around the world they still have a sense of humour. How else would you describe the election result?

So when they announced Mr Bush had scraped in and would now be turning his attention to killing the people he missed in his first four years I decided it was all a big joke.

TALKING of jokes. It's that time of year again folks when the hole-makers take to our roads causing traffic chaos for everyone.

Within a couple of days three have sprung up on my route to work. It was the same last November and the year before that.

I've worn out all my conspiracy theories but here's a new one from a friend of mine: "They are not really workmen but members of a secret society wanting you to drive in a lower gear thus using more petrol.".

And it all links in with the war somehow.