The Saturday Interview

A FIVE pound bet on Manchester City to beat Manchester United 80-0 at Old Trafford - with goalkeeper David James grabbing the opening goal - might seem outrageous, but that's just Mark Molyneaux's style.

The Rossendale United player-manager has so many tricks up his sleeve, he would put David Blaine in the shade.

The eternal practical joker has a long list of pranks - ranging from taking sweets and pies from spectators to dressing up as Spiderman, Father Christmas and even a woman.

He has pushed referees' humour to the limits. But it's his happy-go-lucky attitude that not only keeps the 43-year-old feeling young, it has kept him out of a match official's book too.

"There was one game where I'd found a bra in one of the players' bags. His wife's washing must have got mixed up with his kit, but I put it on for a laugh," the 6ft goalkeeper said.

"The referee was going to book me for ungentlemanly conduct but I said 'You can't do that. I'm a woman' and lifted my shirt up.

"Luckily he saw the funny side and decided not to book me."

Fortunately, the crowd usually have a light-hearted approach to Molyneaux's antics too.

"I've taken pies off spectators while I've been playing and nicked drinks and crisps off kids behind the goal and eaten them," said the former Trafford, Chorley and Salford manager, who, incidentally, would have scooped a cool £5 million had his cheeky flutter come up trumps.

"When I was playing for Salford at Clitheroe about 10 years ago, I ordered a pie when one of the players was down injured, ate it and then paid for it after the game.

"And I once proposed to a woman during a game while I was getting a toffee off her!"

Not even his own players have escaped his sense of fun.

"I've made them go to seven or eight different training venues in pairs while I was sat at home watching television," he laughed.

But when it comes to matchdays, it's a different story.

"When the game's on, I'm very serious, and it's the same in training sessions," he said.

"But, at the same time, we want people to enjoy their football and play with a smile on their face.

"You're only here once so you enjoy life and enjoy everything you do, and that's how I want my players to be as well.

"They all know when it's time to be serious and when it's time to let their hair down and enjoy themselves."

The success Molyneaux and his assistant Wayne Goodison have enjoyed at every club they've taken charge of is testament to that.

And as a result of the groundwork they did at Trafford and the reputation they built up during four years at the helm - establishing them as a solid mid-table outfit in the UniBond First Division, Chorley enticed them to Victory Park.

"It was a bit of a wrench leaving Trafford because it was a very well run club, in every department. We'd moved the club on tenfold, but you've got to push yourself as far as you can go and we saw Chorley as a good opportunity to progress," said father-of-five Molyneaux.

"It was a massive job for us because they were really in dire straits.

"It was a bit of a sleeping giant, but we don't care about past reputations.

"A lot of people there had been allowed to do what they wanted and just went to Chorley for the money.

"But the money doesn't matter to us. It's about doing things right and enjoying your football."

That philosophy had an immediate impact on the handful of players he kept from the squad he inherited, and the signings he made. And in their second season they took the Magpies to within a penalty kick of promotion to the UniBond Premier Division after scraping into the play-offs on the final day of the season, losing out on a Premier place at Radcliffe Borough.

But the game which most sticks in Molyneaux's mind was the one in which they sealed that play-off place with a home win over Gateshead.

"There were about 700 people on that day, and I'll never forget the minute's silence for Jack Kirkland before the game," said the stopper, who had been appointed by the late Chorley chairman.

"The players in the centre circle all linked arms and the players on the sidelines, all with their black Chorley coats on, were hugging each other.

"I just looked around the ground and it was a really special moment for me.

"It was a shame that Jack wasn't there to see it. He was superb."

Sadly, Molyneaux didn't always see eye to eye with Kirkland's replacement, former manager Ken Wright.

"The team wouldn't go into the clubhouse at Lancaster because they'd been to us in a cup game on the Saturday and only one person came into our clubhouse," he revealed.

"So we said we weren't going to go into theirs on the return game.

"I had a row with Ken in their car park over it then got a phonecall the next day to say I'd been sacked.

"I was absolutely gutted because we'd done a lot of good work up there. We'd put together a reserve side, an under 18s side from which we'd brought two players through to first team level and we had a reallly good rapport with the supporters.

"But I still have a lot of good friends at Chorley and I'm not going to let one man ruin that."

Now, after a brief spell in charge of Salford City, Molyneaux is ready to rouse Rossendale United from their early season slumber.

The Dark Lane side sunk to the bottom of the UniBond First Division, but Molyneaux - the Peter Pan of non-league football who isn't prepared to hang up his goalkeeper's gloves without a fight - is confident they can mount a steady climb up the table.

"At the moment we just want to stay in this league, and that's our first aim.

"We want 20 points by Christmas and to improve our goal difference.

"I think a manager probably has a maximum of between three to five years in one place before he or the club are due a change.

"I'd really love to get my teeth into a job."

But, naturally, Molyneaux couldn't resist cracking a joke.

"The chairman's asked me to try to get Champions League by 2009," he quipped.

"And we want to get Manchester United down here and whack them 80-0.

"I'd have a tenner on that!"