I COULDN'T help but splutter into my hot mug of tea when I read the report of a Bury nightspot being turned into an "upmarket lap and pole dancing' club, and that we have to get away from the perception that these places are sleazy'.

Excuse me, but lap dancing clubs, bars, venues where live performances and dancing of a 'licentious, indecent, profane, improper or suggestive' nature are performed are sleazy.

You can spend a million pounds on the decor and furniture, velvet curtains, gold plated cutlery and crystal drinking glasses and spend a fortune on kitting the girls out in, well, a Versace G-string and bra, but does that make their vulgar and squalid gyrations decent and wholesome?

No doubt Mr Clarke will advise me that if I don't like it, to steer well clear of crossing his threshold.

It would sound similar to the BBC's rejection of the complaints regarding Jerry Springer - The Opera - if you don't like it - don't watch it, turn over to the other channels where there's, wait, sex, violence, four letter words!

It will be another nail in the coffin of decency and good taste and I would ask the licensing magistrates to reject the application when it comes before them for a decision.

DEREK EASTHAM