Dear Massi: My husband is in love with an online avatar...

He has become increasingly obsessed with his laptop and phone.

He is constantly on it even when we eat dinner, and I have caught him using his phone every time he is on the toilet. The only respite is when he prays.

I went mad at him when he checked his phone in the middle of our ‘intimate’ time.

I actually thought he was cheating on me.

I made him show me his phone and open up the history on his laptop.

It turns out he has been talking to this female avatar in this virtual world game.

He’s a grown man-he’s 45! How can he be obsessed with a game?

The messages are coming from this female character-the messages are really inappropriate and really personal.

They tell each other intimate things.

I got really angry when I read them and threatened to break his laptop.

He says talking to this person through this game gives him escapism from real life.

I asked how he even know if it’s not a man pretending to be a woman?

He says he won’t give up playing this game and talking to this picture of what looks like a cartoon version of a female superhero in a bikini.

I said it felt like he was cheating on me which he said is ridiculous because he doesn’t know her name or what she looks like.

How messed up is he?.

Massi Says, we all need to unwind, and we all have different methods of relaxing.

However, spending time engaged in an emotional conversation outside of the marriage should sound alarm bells.

Whilst your husband does not believe he is cheating on you in the conventional way, he is still feels the need to communicate his inner most thoughts to another person.

Put your anger to one side to try and understand why your husband feels the need to talk to this other person.

Do you and your husband spend quality time with each other, communicating with each other?

Are you actively involved in each others lives?

Perhaps you can suggest activities that you can do together outside of the home.